This one email changed the way i see people not only as friends in my every day to day life, but in my social media friends lists and in the photography business.
I can go on and on about the inconsistency of gratitude and honesty are in humans and even talk non stop about the cruelty that can come out of peoples mouths.
In 2012, I became a victim of cyber bullying. With out warning, I was being tortured through the world wide web by people who had called me their "friends" via Facebook.
I had posted a photo back in 2012 looking for some honest feedback on an image straight to my wall. There, I received feedback that honestly pushed me to where I stand now in my photography business and the way I shoot and edit. One person, lets refer to her as A, posted on the photo and apparently hated it. Which really isn't a problem. But back then I cared what people would think and got a little defensive. The thing is though, I never actually responded to her comment. I blocked her and deleted her from both my personal and business pages so I wouldn't have the temptation to respond.
For three hours I found myself in the clear. That was, until I received an email from an address that I didn't recognize.
It was from A.
That email stated some really hateful comments such as:
"Take this with a grain of salt. I just saw your pathetic attempt in my newsfeed and thought I'd share some friendly advice but obviously you're too insecure to take criticism of any kind. So insecure, you are constantly fishing from compliments from others about your so called "photography" and probably only are running those action presets in photoshop, huh? News flash. That's not photography, that's hitting play. Have fun with a real photography career... and just remember, sometimes you're not as good as you think you are so try not to be so cocky ;)"
She even went as far as to bring my husband into it. Who at the time, him I worked awesome jobs that we both STILL enjoy almost 3 years later.
"But it's not my fault you can't find a decent job or your husband can't. I sense some jealousy there... I can't apologize for my husband making something of himself and actually doing something. AND ps, you don't have a clue."
By this point, I was heated and attempted to keep a level head. and it just kept coming and coming and coming.
"You have no idea little girl."
"What kind of job do you have? Oh, I forgot. You're a wanna be photographer just like everyone else... Give it a little bit, I am sure it will fizzle out and you'll be not he next thing that is 'cool.' and an easy way to make money quick. Hint, hint crocheting, sewing, etc... You have NO IDEA what humble is when you fish for compliments on your website every other day and just look for attention through your fan page."
NOW, Let me clear the air and let you all know. I DID RESPOND BACK.
I was like I said before, I am a different person now, than I was back then.
Was it a smart move to respond to these hateful emails? NO, and anyone who has fallen victim to anything like this... DO NOT RESPOND TO THESE KIND OF PEOPLE.
So why am I choosing to talk about this now?? Almost three years later. (She shared my to her comments on her blog THE NEXT MORNING)
This is not to hash any old animosity I may have had with these people. I could care less what any of those people think. I chose to talk about this to show that improvement in ones self and goals can be achieved by the actions of others.
At the time all of this was being sent to me, I was a server/corporate trainer for Cheddar's. My husband working for a local bicycle shop. We both had and still have jobs we love. My husband has done everything he can to his best ability to provide for our little family. There is no doubt about it. He's always been a hard worker. We didn't start out like that.
Rewind to 2010-2011.
We struggled. (But, in all honesty, most couples will struggle first couple of years of marriage) We refused to allow ourselves to believe we were struggling. We wanted to succeed. We wanted to have the money to buy nice things and go out to eat. and some nights we did.
Fast forward to 2012. This was our MOUNTAIN TOP. Cheddar's was this awesome company that i KNEW i was going places in and at the time of these emails, I was just promoted to corporate trainer and was making a nice amount of money for every opening I was doing. Jake was able to get fit and healthy and use his story to inspire others at the bike shop. Life was great. Money really wasn't a thing for us at that moment. WE ACTUALLY ENJOYED OUR JOBS and that made us happy.
So why did A think that her hospital management job was better than mine and our jobs together (in her eyes) weren't decent? Well folks, her husband is in the military.... well was. I am totally for our armed forces. I have a minimum of 10 people in my family that are in almost EVERY BRANCH. I have grown an appreciation for the military crowing up right at Camp Lejeune. BUT please don't forget that civilian lives/jobs are important as well. My husband may have not joined the military, but I'll be damned if he did ride side by side with marines on his bike every saturday at the group rides. This time was therapeutical to some. One marine comes into mind right now. My husband was able to get to know Bryant. Bryant has been through a lot. My husband, was able to make a friend in him and use bicycles to help Bryant when it came to some ptsd symptoms. HIS JOB IS IMPORTANT.
These emails have changed me.
I will always take a different approach when it comes to trusting people.
I will NEVER care what people like that think of me.
My photography is that... MINE. Whether people hate it or love it, its really in the eye of the beholder.
For all my T-Swift fans out there... SHAKE IT OFF.
Now I am in FULL swing of my second year in management for cheddars. and my husband has since gone back to the local bicycle shop. Life is good and no matter what life swings at us, were ready.
As crazy as all of those emails went down, I wouldn't have asked for it to happen any other way. A showed me that some people just have terrible attitudes and they hate building people up for success.
I have a crazy awesome life and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Thank you to all the friends, family, and fans that have continually supported me on my photography journey.
Let's make 2015 a HUGE success.
She even went as far as to bring my husband into it. Who at the time, him I worked awesome jobs that we both STILL enjoy almost 3 years later.
"But it's not my fault you can't find a decent job or your husband can't. I sense some jealousy there... I can't apologize for my husband making something of himself and actually doing something. AND ps, you don't have a clue."
By this point, I was heated and attempted to keep a level head. and it just kept coming and coming and coming.
"You have no idea little girl."
"What kind of job do you have? Oh, I forgot. You're a wanna be photographer just like everyone else... Give it a little bit, I am sure it will fizzle out and you'll be not he next thing that is 'cool.' and an easy way to make money quick. Hint, hint crocheting, sewing, etc... You have NO IDEA what humble is when you fish for compliments on your website every other day and just look for attention through your fan page."
NOW, Let me clear the air and let you all know. I DID RESPOND BACK.
I was like I said before, I am a different person now, than I was back then.
Was it a smart move to respond to these hateful emails? NO, and anyone who has fallen victim to anything like this... DO NOT RESPOND TO THESE KIND OF PEOPLE.
So why am I choosing to talk about this now?? Almost three years later. (She shared my to her comments on her blog THE NEXT MORNING)
This is not to hash any old animosity I may have had with these people. I could care less what any of those people think. I chose to talk about this to show that improvement in ones self and goals can be achieved by the actions of others.
At the time all of this was being sent to me, I was a server/corporate trainer for Cheddar's. My husband working for a local bicycle shop. We both had and still have jobs we love. My husband has done everything he can to his best ability to provide for our little family. There is no doubt about it. He's always been a hard worker. We didn't start out like that.
Rewind to 2010-2011.
We struggled. (But, in all honesty, most couples will struggle first couple of years of marriage) We refused to allow ourselves to believe we were struggling. We wanted to succeed. We wanted to have the money to buy nice things and go out to eat. and some nights we did.
Fast forward to 2012. This was our MOUNTAIN TOP. Cheddar's was this awesome company that i KNEW i was going places in and at the time of these emails, I was just promoted to corporate trainer and was making a nice amount of money for every opening I was doing. Jake was able to get fit and healthy and use his story to inspire others at the bike shop. Life was great. Money really wasn't a thing for us at that moment. WE ACTUALLY ENJOYED OUR JOBS and that made us happy.
So why did A think that her hospital management job was better than mine and our jobs together (in her eyes) weren't decent? Well folks, her husband is in the military.... well was. I am totally for our armed forces. I have a minimum of 10 people in my family that are in almost EVERY BRANCH. I have grown an appreciation for the military crowing up right at Camp Lejeune. BUT please don't forget that civilian lives/jobs are important as well. My husband may have not joined the military, but I'll be damned if he did ride side by side with marines on his bike every saturday at the group rides. This time was therapeutical to some. One marine comes into mind right now. My husband was able to get to know Bryant. Bryant has been through a lot. My husband, was able to make a friend in him and use bicycles to help Bryant when it came to some ptsd symptoms. HIS JOB IS IMPORTANT.
These emails have changed me.
I will always take a different approach when it comes to trusting people.
I will NEVER care what people like that think of me.
My photography is that... MINE. Whether people hate it or love it, its really in the eye of the beholder.
For all my T-Swift fans out there... SHAKE IT OFF.
Now I am in FULL swing of my second year in management for cheddars. and my husband has since gone back to the local bicycle shop. Life is good and no matter what life swings at us, were ready.
As crazy as all of those emails went down, I wouldn't have asked for it to happen any other way. A showed me that some people just have terrible attitudes and they hate building people up for success.
I have a crazy awesome life and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Thank you to all the friends, family, and fans that have continually supported me on my photography journey.
Let's make 2015 a HUGE success.
No comments:
Post a Comment